Help please. (self.zoophilia)
submitted 2013-11-08 01:22:21 by pegaggio
Im a 16 year old In Indiana. I feel like my parents should know im Into bestiality. Also would bestiality be a sexual preference like gay or straight. If it helps all my friends know.
I personally wouldn't tell anyone. It's taboo, not to mention illegal in most states.
Also, admitting you're underage on a sex subreddit is probably not a good idea.
Give less info away about yourself. Learn to lurk quietly.
This is something that requires secrecy, it is illegal in a LOT of places. But, I'm glad you have friends who understand. Most of us do not.
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http://cdn.alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/large/misc-are-you-fucking-kidding-me-clean-l.png
(sorry, it's all i have.)
Personal opinion here, but I think it's something best left in the dark, especially to parents, much less friends. At your age, sex is already a taboo, slap zoophilia on that and it becomes a ticking time bomb waiting to explode.
When you're out on your own and know for a fact things are as they are, maybe look into doing it then, but I personally don't see a reason for them (or even friends, outside of sexual partners) to ever know.
I don't personally consider it an orientation, myself, moreso of a 'type,' but again, that's just me.
For as long as you're dependent on your parents for clothing, shelter and food, I would judge it to be a very bad idea to tell them; it could put you in a much more treacherous situation than simply wanting to "scratch an itch", as you are currently. I strongly commend your bravery in telling your friends, as I understand how difficult it is to come out of the zoo closet; I've been there. However, you must ensure their acceptance hasn't lured you into a false sense of security. I would definitely recommend you wait until you are self-sufficient, but it is your choice. Keep in mind that, with time, your urge to tell them may subside, leaving behind a comfortable aura of peace, in which you can settle with your animal partner and simply enjoy your life alongside theirs, irrespective of the knowledge of others. It is not necessary to express everything - find what makes you comfortable.
They kinda found out by some of my porn sneaking into my funny pics.
I'm sorry to hear that, but don't think they would automatically assume you're a zoophile if you're a furry. On that note, it's a really good idea to keep any zoo/furry stuff, pics or otherwise, in a virtual machine with a different password to your main OS. It prevents any sort of intrusion into your most personal files.
Just because they found some pics, doesn't mean you have to fess up about your feelings. Kids your age go through a lot of sexual problems trying to figure out who and what you are and how you are oriented. Play as dumb as you can and make sure you tell them that you like girls (or boys) depending on how religious they are and what they expect of you.
Because of your age and saying "pictures" it sounds like you have no "real" experience yet. And you're so young... you may not even be sure how you are oriented yet.
I have an article from 1979 Ann Landers column about bestiality, but Imgur won't let me upload it today for some reason... maybe because it's a PNG file? Anyone else have it?
I know your situation. I was 15 when I told it to my friends. Most of them didn't have any problems with it. But telling it to my parents was the worst decision I have ever made.
I don't want to simply click a button agreeing or disagreeing with comments below. But there's something very... important that needs to be said here, and that is, the moment you've divulged yoru age as a minor, any sexual talk about a deviant act such as this, (whether you've sought it out or not) is against the law for some states and countries to even TALK to you about.
Charges of Sexual Interference, Sexual Grooming, or in my country there's so much as Inciting Bestiality (Encouraging others to do it) and under the same section, Inciting a Minor into the same (Meaning, a harsher penalty for doing the above mentioned act)
So, advice wise, I would highly suggest that, in a conservative state where you live, to not-tell your parents about your sexuality, unless it's harming you, or harming your social aspect of life, or you are becoming depressed and unable to function because of the sexuality.
I REALLY REALLY REALLY mean it to be that you are actually into depression and on medication type of depression, and that social affecting behaviour, that you will ignore friends and instead go to 'dog shows' to stare at dogs. Or that you'll sit on the internet when you have company over, because you're 'researching nature documentaries' and ignoring social responsibilities.
If you have any of those TRULY harsh and debilitating factors, then I'd tell your parents, but it's going to be a harsh flip-turn in your life, they'll attempt to arrest the situation (Stop it) by counselling, mediation, psychologist visits and may limit internet time, or time near any animals (to stop the behaviour) and if you don't, limit social time as punishment in an attempt to stop the same.
For the ilfestyle choice you've alleged, it is truly best to not speak to family about it, keep it secret, unless it's damaging you, and talk to others into it (When you reach the age of majority) as people will avoid you like the plague in online chatrooms (And those who pay TOO much attention to you are in it for the wrong reasons) Sadly, the length of this response would almost fall into the category I'd just stipulated you avoid, but LOL, I digress.
Please do not consider doing what you've stated you wish to do, and in fact, do the opposite and not tell your parents.
Thank you for listening.
This is the best answer. I could not have said it better.
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Congratulations that you have been able to tell your friends. Based on the way it was phrased, I am taking it that your friends are accepting and even supportive...
Hold off on telling your parents for now. Zoophilia is a better descriptor instead of bestiality. Zoophilia is more likely to be considered a sexual preference (Miletski 1996) it can also be considered a paraphilia...all depends who you talk to.
What do you see as the reason(s) to tell your parents and what do you hope to accomplish?
I want to clear my mind.
There's no such thing. Sorry, but we all end up at a point in life where we learn that the only person who can clear our mind is ourselves. In time you learn that it is your actions that define who you are to others, and your thoughts that define yourself to you. Your parents can't change either of those aspects.
All you'll do is lay the added stress on your parents, who will then make you feel shame and guilt. Only tell them if you want to seek help and get some kind therapy to stop thinking about zoophilia anymore.
Don't do it. I made that fault and it keeps getting remembered until today.
I told my friends first. Most were cool with it. That's what most friends are there for, they respect you. But your family is something different. They are afraid you are going the wrong way, they want you to change.
I told my brother. He got very angry in disbelief. He remembers most likely what I've told him.
I told my mom, while my sister secretly listened. My sister hasn't said anything. My mom would also get angry. She didn't want to believe me, till this day. But I know that she knows that this is true. She almost cried. She wanted me to visit a psychologist.
Knowing this, that your family can't take you for who you are, hurts.
Take my advice. I've made my fault. I can only give you a chance to not do it. Keep in online forums and such to talk about it.
But please, stay out of family with this. Most people don't see it as simply as being gay or straight.
Are you on your own yet? If so, I would do this:
Pull your mom aside in private, tell her "Don't tell anyone, but I'm seeing a psychiatrist finally, I got really confused when I was younger, but I'm doing a lot better, even seeing a girl now, I'm a lot happier."
It will spread like fucking wildfire. Your family will forget all about the crazy nonsense you said in the past, dismissing it. They'll want to meet the girl. That's fine, you can "break up" a week or two later, say it sucked but you're enjoying meeting new people... etc.
My moral of the story: sometimes you gotta lie like a dog take a few blows to your image to fix your image.
Not a good advice.
I'm not zoo exclusive, I've got my girlfriend already. We are together for 3 years now. And that's cool. My mom might have forgotten, but I don't think so. She thinks it was just a small strange time of my puberty.
I will not lie to my mom, nor to my family about this. Life is going forward, I'll not bury that up again. I've got my lesson.
Good, I only gave that as advice because I have no idea what your situation and feelings might be. I hope the best for you.
I used to live in Indiana. DO NOT tell them. It used to be legal in Indiana until 2007. Now it's a FELONY to have sex with an animal.
I bet your friends think you're joking. NEVER tell anyone. NO ONE. Except us that is. Mundanes will never understand this thing of ours.
Bestiality was never "legal" in Indiana just because there was not a specific bestiality law, you could have still been arrested and charged with animal abuse, animal cruelty, indecent exposure, trespassing, and even "crimes against nature." Whether it is a crime today in Indiana or not doesn't matter- keep it to yourself, tell no one, never take pictures or videos, never keep same downloaded on a computer, always lock the door and pull the drapes if you are having sex. But yeah, a kid telling his friends, gezz, talk about giving a loaded powder keg full of bully bait for them to use! you know one friend will tell another friend about his friend who does dogs, next thing you know that friend tells a couple of friends and before you know it it's all over the entire school and neighborhood! Just reading about GAY kids coming out in school and what hell they went through is enough, the only possible "saving" grace might be the likelyhood the friends didn't believe the dog story and think he was making up bullshit for the shock value and testing them or something, most people would think the story is just bullshit and don't really believe it, that is why many people who told by a zoo that they are a zoo seem "okay" with it- they don't believe it's real.
Like the tree that falls in the forest with no one around, did a sex act even occur if no one saw it? if no one saw it, then there was no crime.
Prior to becoming "illegal" in IN. perps were charged with "trespassing". I remember seeing several newspaper articles on the subject. None were ever charged for having sex with their own animal, IE, no ex-wives accusing ex-husbands etc... All were men "fence hopping" and screwing someone elses animals.
How the new law got passed was, some lady was pissed upon reading about the chicken in the motel room thing, and that all the perp could be charged with was damage to property, theft (of the chicken). She got some lawmaker involved and they thought they'd be able to get a bunch of new anti-dog cruelty measures passed along with the anti-bestiality act.... and..... the lawmakers looked at her bill, deleted all the anti-dog cruelty measures, and passed the anti-bestiality part. LOL.. fucking politicians.
"and that all the perp could be charged with was damage to property, theft (of the chicken)."
It really doesn't matter what the perp is charged with since even animal abuse charges only carry a small jail time if any and fine, what does matter is the perp's name, home address, mug shots, and all of the gritty details about how they were arrested for fucking chickens (or whatever) goes out all over their local newspapers, TV news and media. What's more, blogs, forums, other news stations and AP share and link to each other's stories and Google captures every word of it quite permanently. People also share and repost such news stories, so the effect is the perp is convicted by the public and the media to the extent that even if they get off with a $50 fine they are as good as "dead", they won't get a job or lose the one they had, everyone around will know who they are and what they got busted for, people in the supermarket and sidewalks will stare and point, landlords may find a "reason" to get the perp evicted and out on the street. Most people if they fall behind on mortgage payments lose their house too, so even 90 days in jail or loss of a job finishes things up.
Just having a bestiality case in the news at all is more than enough punishment, that 30 days or 90 in jail won't make one bit of difference.
I'm sure the Indiana thing was more than just some pissed off woman about a chicken acting alone, she got PeTA and public opinion on her side and they were involved. Once the story breaks and the media publishes something about the fact the state doesn't have a law against bestiality, you can bet some lawmaker will be outraged enough to write up and sponsor a bill all on their own, blame the media for they are the ones who report such matters and then include details about laws no one knew anything about.
Her push for the new law really seemed to be about her anti-dog abuse rules. And that she was just using the bestiality thing as a sort of carrier... so ironic that the lawmakers ruled out all her dog points, and only outlawed bestiality.
I made the mistake many years ago, of telling my then GF about my zoophilia. I had thought her totally trustworthy, someone I could tell ANYTHING to.
She totally flipped out. Didn't talk to me for weeks... we broke up eventually. In hindsight, there was no reason for me to tell her and she NEVER would have suspected that was something I was into unless she actually caught me in the act. So never tell anyone. Keep it to yourself and ask us if you need to talk or need any advice.
If you are struggling psychologically with something that is bothering you about your interest, I strongly recommend you talk to a school counselor and ask to speak to someone about a depression related problem that you cannot talk to your parents about.
If you are comfortable with yourself and what you are "interested in" then please, please PLEASE keep your mouth shut. If you have been caught with adult material, you can honestly tell your parents that you were just curious and NEVER GET CAUGHT AGAIN. Don't touch the stuff, stay away from porn. In a couple short years you'll be old enough to look at what you want, until then, play it cool or you may SERIOUSLY regret it. You're already under close scrutiny, so don't be dumb.
Speaking of serious regrets. DON'T ACT ON YOUR DESIRES. Not at all. Keep it as a fantasy, keep it locked up, behind a wall of concrete, with chains and padlocks and a big sign on the front that says: "Do not open until living by myself, when I have my own life and do not have to worry about getting caught."
Any adults that suspect you may be acting inappropriately with an animal will consider it animal abuse, and no amount of convincing will change their minds. You will get dragged from therapist to therapist, your parents will be upset and you will cause a lot of distress. The family pets will be taken away. That's just how society works. Also, do not discuss it with anyone your age either, because people tend to gossip, and if it gets out, your high-school life will be hell.
Zoophilia is not like being gay in the eyes of psychiatry or the law. It's illegal and considered a mental disorder, so please be careful, and be DISCRETE.
Your parents/friends don't need to know about the other aspects of your sexualitydo they? Do they need to know that you're into bondage porn, or S&M lesbian porn, or have a thing for Asians taking facials? No, that is information that just is not necessary for your parents/friends to know about you. Same with the the bestiality. Good god, especially your friends. You'd never hear the end of it. I know you want to come clean and 'clear your head,' but really it will just cause more issues that it solves. Let sleeping dogs lie ;)
OP hasn't posted in 6 days. I have a feeling he "came out" or got caught and isn't allowed a computer anymore.
No just thinking about your responses.
My urge to tell has receded a little.
Thank god. This will make your remaining teenage years much more pleasant. I hope that as you grow you learn that from the perspective of other people, zoophilia is widely considered abhorrent and completely unacceptable. It's arguable that it's a valid sexual orientation, but since animals cannot speak for what they want, people will always consider it abuse, or potential abuse at best.
You're not bad or wrong for having thoughts or fantasies about it. You don't need to feel guilty as long as you're not harming anyone or anything. (If you have even the slightest uncertainty if something is considered harm, it probably is.)
When you're old enough to participate in the discussion, there are lots of websites and forums that provide support, friends and perspective about zoophilia, so don't feel alone. Just be patient and finish your education, don't alienate yourself from people, make human friends and date if the opportunity presents itself. You're very young and the things you like will probably change several times over, so be open to change. I hope it all goes well for you!