So I just came across this post (http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/s1o90/i_think_my_teenage_son_may_have_sodomized_our_dog/?limit=500) to AskReddit during a google search for "Sodomy Dog's Furry Pack" (Cards Hgainst Humanity pack irreverent but I just want to get all the information in here.).
It honestly pisses me off so much that any interest in something not "normal" seems to indicate a problem with you. I really wish that society would just accept everyone for who they are. As a homosexual, zoosexual, and furry it is very frustrating to feel that I constantly have to hide things that I love! I am not talking about like having sex with a dog in public or anything like that either (although I don't understand what the problem is with that if that is your thing). I am talking more about being able to truly show my love for animals.
Now I understand in that particular question it seems the dog was harmed by the acts described. I do not think this was intentional in any way, it seems to me that the son in question was exploring his sexuality and unfortunately did not have the information to go about it properly. I personally think this is another problem with the extreme sexual repression in our world today. I believe here as zoos we all understand that there are ways to love our animal companions and partners not only with out causing them harm but furthermore, causing them pleasure as well. Yet because zoosexuality is still seen as "wrong" by most people, there are very very few places that people looking for information, help, and understanding can go. In fact going to most places you normally would for help (like a counselor) you are treated as if you have a mental disorder or physiological issue instead of just having a different sexuality.
I also feel so bad for the aforementioned son, I know how lonely it feels when no one knows and you are just hiding it, I can't imagine what it must feel like when your family knows and thinks you are basically an abomination. Love and support from others, even family, is so rare and unsupported in society I feel like I just want to run away from it all and go live out in the middle of the wilderness somewhere...
I just had to get all that off my chest, I hope I picked the right place to do it. I apologize if this has already been discussed here, I know the article was posted about 2 years ago, but it is new to me.
First and foremost, welcome. This is certainly the right place for this sort of thing, and don't worry about reposts becuase your story is individual, even if many of us share similar sentiments.
Let me start with a rhetorical question: why do communities like this one exist? What purpose do they serve? We have them because life is manifestly unfair, and nobody deserves to fight their battles alone. As a zoophile, good luck getting the support you need from those around you; it can and odes happen, but the odds are heavily skewed against you. I wish I could tell you there was a catch-all fix to the social stigmatism of zoophiles, but there isn't. All we can give you are coping strategies, and while it is your choice whether you choose to follow them or not, I can guarantee that making peace with the system and your place therein is one of the biggest gifts you can give yourself.
I do think this is a bit misplaced, though. If you see a two-bit school/community counsellor about your zoophilia, the results will most likely not be positive. However, it is recognised in the DSM-V that zoophilia is not inherently a disorder nor is it curable, and as such treatment should be directed towards any other apparent issues, such as depression and anxiety, pertaining to zoophilia; any reputable psychologist would heed the recommendation and hold aside their personal judgement as is their responsibility as a professional in their field.
As for the son in the AskReddit story, I think he did was wrong and I have very limited sympathy. For a vet to diagnose anal sex over, say, a fissure resulting from constipation, the evidence would have been strong and obvious towards the former, which would indicate clear suffering. The internet is full of guides on safe sex with animals, so for the dog to be injured and distraught shows a complete lack of care, preparation and love involved - I'm willing to bet he didn't even use lube. The son had access to bestiality porn so he could hardly have been ignorant of zoophile sites that teach the proper way to go about things; a simple google search or a post in a community like this one would have pointed him in the right direction. We get posts from nervous, inexperienced zoos seeking guidance all the time, and he could have easily been one of them. You can call me heartless if you want but it seems to me that he deserved to be outed for his cruelty and negligence.
It's okay. I can't tell you that it'll change in our lifetimes, and I'm afraid to say your spirit will be crushed if you fight against it. At the risk of sounding defeatist, your best bet is to buy a house (or better yet, an acreage), draw the blinds/shut the stables and enjoy your forbidden relationship in peace with an animal mate you love, and who loves you. If you're lucky, you'll come out to a human partner or friend who turns out to be open enough to accept you for who you are, and suddenly you'll have someone you can share your thoughts or even your life with. It is important to choose wisely though - a wrong assumption could be ruinous, and never think that someone who is progressive on other issues is inherently accomodating of zoophilia. Again, online communities like this one exist for support and to lend a helping hand to those who need it, so don't leave your concerns unvoiced. Nobody is judging you here.
As a side note, do you hike/camp as a hobby? Many zoos I know do, myself included - if you're the sort who likes to get away from the rest of humanity I strongly recommend it if you don't already.
Thank you very much for the detailed response and welcome to the community. I actually thought the DSM-V labeled it as some sort of disorder but apparently I was mistaken as to what it said thank you for the information, it might be something to being up with counselor I already see for my anxiety depression issues, although it is still something I will have to think about it is not easy for me opening up in person especially about something like this.
As for the story I obliviously feel for the dog, that he was hurt troubles me a lot. I think my sympathy and want for more information comes from experience. I have a boyfriend and our first few attempts at sex ended poorly because of inexperience and lack of info. The truth is that due to porn we thought it would be easy and didn't even think to look up any of the complexities or how to do things more safely until after we attempted a couple of times and got frustrated. I think that this might also be the case here.
I used to camp a lot when I was a child and I really enjoyed it, unfortunately my partner isn't as into spending time in nature as I am. Fortunately, if I want to get away a little bit I can go out for a trail ride at the stable where I work (I work as his mothers groom and help train/take care of the horses). We do plan to buy a house away from things though when we have the means, he understands my feelings of wanting to get away and although he doesn't share them he knows how important it is to me. He is aware of my sexuality and sexual interests and is very accepting thankfully.
As to accepting the system and my place in it... for me that isn't an option for many reasons. I guess primarily I am a dreamer and strive always to make things better, if we all give in to the system it can't change is how I feel. I know it does make me miserable sometimes but I think it is important to not give up. I think part of that comes from having a mild case of High Functioning Autism (aspergers). Contrary to what some people think it has nothing to do with intelligence nor does it just make you an asshole. All Autism is basically a difficulty communicating the same as non Autistic people. With aspergers the best way I can explain it is that it feels like everyone else got this rule book on how to act and how the system works but no one ever gave me my copy. So throughout life I have been on the outside of society looking in. This has led me to have a great disdain for society as I see so much of the judgement, intolerance, and bigotry that I don't think most people overlook because it is seen as acceptable to judge, be intolerant of, be bigoted against. (such as zoos, gays, political beliefs, religions, ect.) I know that in reality I have little chance of changing anything, and that most people don't understand my perspective, but I think it is still important to try.
hiya. just wanted to say welcome to the community. the system is indeed shitty and hard to just accept (and we shouldn't have to, but .. well, the world just isn't ready). hopefully things will change little by little, but it will definitely take decades. the world right now seems to be waking up suddenly and realizing we exist. there are so many countries in europe making laws now, it seems. definitely a step backwards in one respect, but perhaps in another it's sortof a step forwards, in that people ARE finally aware that we exist and have to confront their feelings about what that means. hopefully some will come to places like this and ask questions and get real answers.
fyi, that story (don't forget parts 2 3 and 4 is fake. I don't have the proof on hand, but I believe it was originally posted with Colby being a cat instead of a dog then quickly deleted.
I can say this is true for many groups. I am not a zoo, but I say hating any group is wrong, hate at all is wrong. I can not find anything wrong with being a zoophile, but even groups that have better 'reasons' for being hated I do not agree with. People act like thought and action are the same thing, and they are not, we choose what thoughts we act on. I read a study a while back and as it turns out most people have homicidal thoughts/images in their heads, but if you ever say that out loud you are instantly a monster. In fact I will admit it, I have seen it in my head, plenty of times, sure as heck will never act on it though. Anybody who says they are a pedophile is instantly a social outcast and actually in risk of being killed, even though they do not choose the attraction, only whether or not they act on it (which most choose not to). As far as I can see, there is nothing wrong with being a zoophile, and I can not even find a reason to see fault in acting on it.
I agree with you completely, it is too bad more people couldn't be so understanding... the world would be a much better place...