What's the difference? (self.zoophilia)
submitted 2015-06-07 08:53:32 by furvert_tail Equine, large canid
There's been a question on my mind for some time now: what is the difference between a fetish, a paraphilia, and a sexuality?
I don't mean in the strict research/scientific senses of the word (which I know), I mean in their common uses. Where do people typically see the boundary?
I see a sexuality as an attraction; gay, straight, bi, whichever. Fetishes are something specific that gets you going; examples, licking someone's feet while they whisper "Kali Mah". Or maybe just seeing boobs. Paraphilias, to me, are a moderate to extreme deviation from general societies perceived "normal" sexualities. So, zoophilia in my mind is a paraphilia
"an attraction" seems vague. In your opinion, can zoophilia be both a sexuality and a paraphilia? There is no wrong answer, I'm trying to learn what normal people mean with the words.
Technically, a fetish (from the portuguese word feiticio = enchantment) is usually about inanimate objects, like certain fabrics (latex), for example. A paraphilia ( from the greek hae philia = friendship and para = beyond, like in paranormal) is an attraction towards anything that is beyond the norm. A sexuality (or sexual orientation) is the general term to address a specific sexual behaviour.
So, zoophilia is a paraphilia because it is beyond the norm. If you are zoo exclusive, then loving an animal is your sexual orientation; if you´re not exclusive and engage in human on human sex too, then you´re a bestialist and this is your sexuality. If you like the fur of any or specific animals and only that triggers your arousal, then you´re a fetishist.
Umm, yeah, this sentence gave me all kinds of heebee geebees. So you can only love an animal if you are exclusive? What does love have to do with sexuality? Or is the loving you're talking about just sex?
There are remnants of the "bestiality bad", "zoophilia good" thinking we used to use to separate ourselves from those who would abuse animals. I dislike it because it implicitly says "sex with animals" is wrong. I really think we need to look at being more inclusive. It's the zoo equivalent of saying "sex outside of marriage is wrong", or "Men rape, so all men are to be suspected".
I can liken also it to a bisexual who is married to the opposite sex. They are still bisexual while in the heterosexual relationship. The relationship gives them some privilege as "straight passing" but that does not mean they have stopped being bisexual. Something known as bisexual erasure where you're either gay or your not.
I am married to a lovely human, but identify primarily as zoosexual. Sex with humans doesn't bother me.
The analogy to bisexuals seems particularly fitting here. It seems to me that being human inclusive doesn't necessarily mean animals can't be as important to you as to zoo exclusives, or that you can't love them as deeply or in the same way.
I think a fetish is something that arouses someone. A paraphilia is something that someone loves to the point of obsession. A sexuality is something that one tends to seek out sexually.
I think theres some confusion as to whether zoophilia is a paraphilia or sexuality because once again we use the term zoophilia as a catch all for 'people who do stuff with animals'. the difference between a paraphilia and a sexuality is, in this case, more of a change in perspective rather than a completely different thing.
zoosexuality is the sexuality while beastiality is the paraphilia. I used zoosexual instead of zoophilia so that we don't leave out the sex acts from either term. (anyone want to contact oxford dictionary and try and get these terms standardized? :P but seriously, everyone using their own definitions of these terms gets a bit confusing if one doesn't realize that people define them differently.)
zoos view animals as the focus of their sexual preference, wheres beasties just view the animal as a means to get off. The animal represents something else for them. I'm going to open a can of worms and say that beasties don't connect with animals on the same level that zoosexuals do.
I used to know a really good description of sexual orientation, I believe it had three parts, but I cant find it.
Under this description zoophilia (zoosexuality) fits under a sexual orientation.
The lines are blurred even in the medical world. Often with a subjective judgement of harm being the defining point. But here is my take...
Zoosexual is someone whose primary sexual interest is in a non-human animal partner, seeks that out, and makes it a key part of their lives.
A fetish fits the definition of a sexuality except it's focus is much more specific, as described above often an object it can be attitudes, words, pretty much anything. The difference being that a fetish is often required to complete the sexual act.
A paraphilia is an overriding attraction, either fetish or sexuality which prevents enjoyment or results in problematic behaviour for the individual. It's not a disease, and often can be managed with support.
Here's how I define the words:
A fetish is a specific sexual interest in something other than sex. Examples include non-genital body parts, the feel of different materials, or domination and submission.
A paraphilia is a broader category including sexual interests in things other than the usual interests in consenting adult human beings who are either physically or emotionally attractive in a traditional sense. This includes rubbing against people on the subway, attraction to children or the elderly, or attraction to hurting others. Also, zoophilia.
Sexual orientation changes depending on whether we're speaking about the individual level or the societal level. An individual's orientation basically includes all of their preferences and distastes sexually, including fetishes and paraphilias. However, we usually speak of orientation as being limited to one of a few categories. For those categories, I like Francoeur's definition: if you have feelings for it, fantasize about it, and want to fuck it, then it's a part of your sexual orientation. As far as these simpler categories are concerned, hetero, homo, and bi are the main accepted ones, though I do think that there are many other, less common orientations, including zoosexuality.
Personally I think of 'sexuality' as an over-arching umbrella. All attractions, orientations, preferences, fetishes, paraphilia, etc. fit under it.
I find my kuvasz bitch very attractive, but humans disgust me. there is nothing remotely arousing about human porn of either gender. I have never had sex with a human, or even kissed one, and never will.
a bitch in heat will get me hard but human port is a huge turnoff. I love my bitch unconditionally in the same way a human couple love eachother. I am only attracted to animals. specifically I am a heterocynosexual (female dog lover) zoosexual with a 'thing' for kuvaszok, just as some guys have a 'thing for ' blondes, or redheads for example. which brings up another point. zoosexuals all have a different opinion on what is 'hot' just as gays and straights do. I love kivasz, the next zoo may love saints or danes, for example.... some like short coats, I like a nice thick double-coat....sure a dogpussy is a dogpussy but I would not get nearly as into the porn as I would if the images were of a kuvasz, or a similar looking dog like a pyrenees or a maremma sheepdog. some guys like skinny tall bitches, I like slightly chubby bitches with legs proportional to their bodysize. every zoo has their own idea of what the ideal ''woman'' should look like. the one thing we all have in common is we are sexually attracted to animals instead of humans, and we love our 'wives' unconditionally. that makes it a sexuality.
engaging in bestial sex just for fun is a kink akin to a man engaging in gay sex just to try something new. but otherwise being straight. both are a fetish. the first isnt zoo just cause he fucked a dog once, and the second isnt gay just cause he had one gay encounter. people experiment all the time.
zoosexuality is the sexual attraction to animals. just as homosexuality is the attraction to someone of the same gender. if you dont have the sexual attraction, then what your doing is indulging a kink.