I'm zoo-exclusive, so I can't really give very much advice on this front. It's not something I've thought about a lot. I can offer the general advice though, of, you should get to know how he feels about the topic before admitting your interest in it. I think you should know how he feels and about how he'll react before you actually get around to coming out to him.
If it turns out he's open and accepting about the topic, congratulations! Though that doesn't necessarily mean he'll be willing to "share" you - that could still be a sticking point. If it turns out he's anti-zoo, well... Best of luck. Do what seems best to you with that knowledge.
ZooIam 1 point on 2016-02-08 03:05:54
Hi and welcome!
This is always a difficult question and really depends on who your partner is. I feel that this always comes down to what you are comfortable losing if you talk about it with him. Potential courses of action and outcomes might be something like:
You tell him. He finds the idea and you repulsive and you lose someone with whom you could have had a life. You are however, honest with yourself and remain true to what makes you, you. While painful in the short term, you've saved yourself a lot of angst in the future.
You tell him. He accepts you but still does not want it to be apart of your lives. The immediate feelings of intimacy and acceptance fade over time and the need for animal romance nags at you on a daily basis. Alternatively, you decide that your relationship is worth it and you successfully suppress your desires.
You tell him, he's into it, happily ever after.
You don't tell him. You proceed to have a non sexual relationship with the dog, suppress your desires, and experience the emptiness of both hiding something from yourself and your partner. This does have the benefit of a relationship free from potential conflict caused by zoophilia.
You don't tell him and engage in a relationship with the dog. This is probably the riskiest as the cost of being discovered is potentially very high. You could lose him and the life you've built together. Rather than approaching the subject openly out of a need for intimacy, your activity will be viewed as betrayal. Even if you are not discovered, you may experience guilt and find that your relationship with him is less attractive out of a lack of intimacy. Secrets have a way of wedging people apart.
I'm sure there are more outcomes, but the decision you face is based on the cost of what you risk losing, what's to be gained, and trying to predict how you'll feel in the future.
Personally, my experience was number 2. I felt it was the right thing to do, but after years of marriage, I feel very empty inside and there are still unresolved issues between us, stemming from my partners prejudice towards zoophilia. I now am in a position where I don't feel close to my wife, and cannot have a dog as it would only drive us apart further. To fill that emotional hole, I talk with people online about it.
/r/zoophilia archive
I'm zoo-exclusive, so I can't really give very much advice on this front. It's not something I've thought about a lot. I can offer the general advice though, of, you should get to know how he feels about the topic before admitting your interest in it. I think you should know how he feels and about how he'll react before you actually get around to coming out to him.
If it turns out he's open and accepting about the topic, congratulations! Though that doesn't necessarily mean he'll be willing to "share" you - that could still be a sticking point. If it turns out he's anti-zoo, well... Best of luck. Do what seems best to you with that knowledge.
Hi and welcome!
This is always a difficult question and really depends on who your partner is. I feel that this always comes down to what you are comfortable losing if you talk about it with him. Potential courses of action and outcomes might be something like:
You tell him. He finds the idea and you repulsive and you lose someone with whom you could have had a life. You are however, honest with yourself and remain true to what makes you, you. While painful in the short term, you've saved yourself a lot of angst in the future.
You tell him. He accepts you but still does not want it to be apart of your lives. The immediate feelings of intimacy and acceptance fade over time and the need for animal romance nags at you on a daily basis. Alternatively, you decide that your relationship is worth it and you successfully suppress your desires.
You tell him, he's into it, happily ever after.
You don't tell him. You proceed to have a non sexual relationship with the dog, suppress your desires, and experience the emptiness of both hiding something from yourself and your partner. This does have the benefit of a relationship free from potential conflict caused by zoophilia.
You don't tell him and engage in a relationship with the dog. This is probably the riskiest as the cost of being discovered is potentially very high. You could lose him and the life you've built together. Rather than approaching the subject openly out of a need for intimacy, your activity will be viewed as betrayal. Even if you are not discovered, you may experience guilt and find that your relationship with him is less attractive out of a lack of intimacy. Secrets have a way of wedging people apart.
I'm sure there are more outcomes, but the decision you face is based on the cost of what you risk losing, what's to be gained, and trying to predict how you'll feel in the future.
Personally, my experience was number 2. I felt it was the right thing to do, but after years of marriage, I feel very empty inside and there are still unresolved issues between us, stemming from my partners prejudice towards zoophilia. I now am in a position where I don't feel close to my wife, and cannot have a dog as it would only drive us apart further. To fill that emotional hole, I talk with people online about it.
Sorry for grammar, typing with thumbs.
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