Experience with therapy? (self.zoophilia)
submitted 2016-12-10 19:32:03 by matangi77
Anyone have experience talking about zoophilia/zoosexuality to a therapist? Did it go well? Bad? Was it helpful in coming to terms with your sexuality? Tell me your story <3
I have never taken my paraphilia to a therapist.
People with non standard sexual orientations or quirks usually don't take much benefit from therapy. The book "Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia" has some testimonials of people whose life didn't improve after therapy, and some redittors here had their lives ruined because of therapy. It seems to me that erasing real zoophilia through therapy is just like erasing homosexuality through therapy. It just does not work.
A person who is just somebody who is bored with regular sex and wants to try bestialism because of the need to break boredom has probably some chance to get back to the mainstream track, but you will notice that those are not considered real zoophiles at all around here.
Are we talking about conversion / elimination therapy though or just plain having someone to talk to?
That distinction is important.
Is it really though? talking to someone who probably goes home to their normal family life means they would never really know what you're going through, surely?
unless you see a gay therapist I suppose. At least they'll have a bit more of an idea.
There are therapists who specialize in sexual issues. Regardless, the distincition is still important, as one is very probably extremely harmful, the other potentially (not always, but potentially) helpful. The psychiatrist who was most open to the idea of zoophilia with me was straight and heterosexual, so I don't think it's strongly correlated, really.
I think it depends on what they want out of talking about being zoo in therapy. If they just want to be able to talk about it, the person they're talking to doesn't necessarily have to understand exactly what they're going through. Like, when I'm having a hard time with a situation (or even my sexuality) I like to vent about it to friends. My friends aren't in the same situation and they aren't zoo either, but talking it out still helps. Someone to just listen might be all they need/want.
I was actually thinking about stop-being-a-monster-and-be-like-us style therapy, because that is the one I always hear about.
That would be the former I was refering to, and was also subjected too personally.
No, that one I can't recommend.
I'm going to be that guy and say that therapy is just as evil as big pharma, and it's just best to stay away from it period.
Therapy's saved my life twice, brought me out of depressive breakdowns, and helped me learn how to "retrain" my depressive thoughts and have a better life not as severely affected by the depression and anxiety I struggle with. You have to find the right therapist and it depends on what you're going for. Combined with medication (in the case of mental illness obviously, not sexuality) therapy literally saves and improves peoples' lives on a regular basis. That's what it's for. It's fine if you don't like/want therapy for yourself, but don't discourage other people who would benefit from getting help.
Anyway back on topic, I haven't brought it up with a therapist myself, but I know a couple of people who have and their experience was fine. Again I'd say it depends on the therapist. If your attraction's not affecting your daily life in a negative way, or obsessive thoughts, then a reasonable therapist probably isn't going to want to try to change it.
This is probably going to blow peoples minds, but I don't have a negative view of therapy and even think with the right therapist, it can be helpful / beneficial.
Yes, I had a bad experience. But I was forced into therapy I did not want in the worst possible way. Despite all this, I met a psychiatrist who I really had a mutual relationship with at the end, and I do believe this individual undid much of the damage others had done, possibly saving my life.
My advice? If you want someone to talk to, consider it. But do it on your terms, and remember, it's a service. If you don't like them, find someone else or stop. Just don't explicitly admit to anything illegal, and it really is completely in your hands, and does not have to be bad.
I've brought up zoophilia with some therapists. Note, not to "get it cured", but because when I'm depressed I think a lot about how many people would hate me if they knew what I liked... Anti-zoo sentiments have sometimes given me suicidal thoughts, and it helps to talk about it with someone you can trust.
Not all therapists are good. My recommendation is to go to a real psychologist rather than a counselor with less training. And you don't have to bring up zoophilia until you've already had a couple of appointments. You can also start by saying something like "I have unusual sexual fantasies*, but I don't like to go into detail". Also, read up on the rules in your country/state, doctor-patient confidentiality is important in this case!
*(or lifestyle/family situation depending on what is relevant for you)
I've been helped by therapy. But the therapy should focus on making you healthy and happy, not about making you normal. So if your problem is anxiety or bad self-esteem, for instance, focus on that.
I went to therapy just to talk, it wasn't really good or bad. She wasn't hostile, but she didn't know anything about so,it was really a learning experience for her and a confusing time for me.
I wish I'd been able to find a good therapist. I recently list two very good jobs because I have ADHD, and wasn't aware of that fact. This has me a little messed up, and my doctor and a lot of resources say that ADHD is linked with depression. I can see some of that.
On top of that, I've got some relationship stuff to work through, and am trying to deal with an orientation that's increasingly zoo.
I'm not whining, btw, there's a point. The term "kink-positive" and "kink-aware" lead me to a few therapists who I can believe could handle a non-judgemental chat with a zoophile. But it's very difficult to find one that can also help with the more "help get my life together" stuff. For something like a paraphilia, you'd need a specialist, I think, and they don't seem to handle general life-angst :( sex, relationship, orientation, all part of the same tangle...
I have had two different therapy "events" in my life.....and I'm pretty long in the tooth :) Both times were when I had lost K9 partners and was borderline suicidal. Neither time was with ANY intention to somehow get "cured" of who I am. Both times (with different therapists each time.......and separated by over ten years) lasted a few months. Both of the professionals that I saw were understanding and non-judgemental about my SEXUAL ORIENTATION (and I capitalized that because that is how I communicated my relationship with my bitches to them both).
Naturally, I did some research into who I would see before hand, and obviously the second time around was a lot easier. In the first case it was with the help of my mother (who knows about me and worked in social services at the time), and in the second case it was with the help of my human girlfriend (who also knows about me and is supportive, and who was seeing a therapist for unrelated early life issues on a long term basis). They (the therapists) treated me as they would anyone else who was having a difficult time dealing with the loss of someone who is deeply loved.
As Rannoch2002 said, the context of your question is VERY important for a cogent answer, but my answer is based upon the assumption that you are asking because you don't want a "cure", but just someone to talk with/receive pharmacologic relief with the issues that zoophiles inevitably will go through with loss and depression and coming to terms with their non-mainstream and generally unaccepted by society sexuality.
My personal experience is (excuse any mistakes, english is not my first language): unless you're 100% sure your therapist will remain professional and not freak out, don't do it. Specially if you're in a country where it's illegal. I was lucky enough that my therapist was also a sexologist and very rational (and had seen way worse than plain old zoo) so it was very smooth and helped me a lot.