Zoophilia Cards Against Humanity Cards (self.zoophilia)
submitted 2017-09-07 03:34:33 by soldierboy2b Doggo

I am making a zoophilia Cards Against Humanity pack as a surprise present for someone and need some ideas, please.

Okay, so here is the link to download the cards: https://www.dropbox.com/sh/6awjylk52ue56cj/AAAAVulfVlnoQItigbnR_2ZBa?dl=0

Kynophile Dog lover 3 points on 2017-09-07 03:41:30

PM me later. I don't have time right now to help you out, but I'm sure I can think of stuff in the meantime. I'd also love to see what you have so far.

soldierboy2b Doggo 1 point on 2017-09-07 03:51:30

Cool, will do.

AmoreBestia Pro-zoophile, non-zoophile. 2 points on 2017-09-07 04:34:44

Oh dear...

OnzaZ 2 points on 2017-09-07 06:34:56

What is cards against humanity? o.O

AmoreBestia Pro-zoophile, non-zoophile. 5 points on 2017-09-07 06:53:47

Think of a really depraved Apples to Apples

OnzaZ 1 point on 2017-09-11 05:34:56

What? XD no idea what apples to apples even is.

AmoreBestia Pro-zoophile, non-zoophile. 1 point on 2017-09-11 05:53:10

It's ad lib with cards. There's an online version of CAH here.

30-30 amator equae 2 points on 2017-09-07 20:22:22
[deleted] 2 points on 2017-09-08 01:27:02

[deleted]

AmoreBestia Pro-zoophile, non-zoophile. 1 point on 2017-09-08 01:52:31

I like CAH, myself. Am not kid. It's just that this would be one of those decks where I'd have to seriously ask myself if I wanted to use it, for some reason.

Bowaustin 2 points on 2017-09-07 05:26:33

Can we get this produced as a third party expansion please?

soldierboy2b Doggo 2 points on 2017-09-07 16:16:42

Card Against Animalia, a card game for knotty people.

Battlecrops cat kisser extraordinaire 1 point on 2017-09-09 22:48:26

Honestly some of the cards in the furry pack on that online site come pretty close.

Bowaustin 1 point on 2017-09-10 00:36:51

That's true iv always wished that pack was actually in print so I could add it to my physical copy of the game

yrs-bluebox 11 points on 2017-09-07 06:51:15

I have a few answer cards that come to mind: Peanutbutter and shame Being knotted for twenty minutes A sexy mare pussy Being perpetually in heat Googling dog cum nutrition facts at 3am Trying to stay quiet during your third orgasm Fur on your tongue while licking teats Falling off the stool the first time

And a few question cards: Whats that sound? Why am I walking funny? Why am I blushing? Why can't I stop staring? Where are my keys? What is that smell? What is my greatest fear?

Hope that helps! Would love to see the final result.

soldierboy2b Doggo 2 points on 2017-09-08 01:14:53

Where are my keys?

Oh... Oh, God.

Swibblestein 15 points on 2017-09-07 09:18:54

Let me think here... How about some of these?


White Cards:

Misuse of Veterinary Lubricant
Scratches all over my back
Brucellosis
Milk, straight from the source
A vigorous argument between a horse zoo and dog zoo
Mr. Hands
Furious Winking
Fencehopping
Explaining to your mother why you've got fur in your teeth
Edible lingerie made out of meat
True ZoophiliaTM
Fortune Cookie
A knot too big to take out but too big to leave in
Dog Breath
Outliving five lovers
A crocodile in a bra
Crushing isolation with an aftertaste of goat semen
Milkbones
A romantic game of fetch
Socks on paws
Silicone animal wangs


Black Cards:

Just the right height, no ______ required.
I had trouble passing until I discovered ______.
Stuck in the closet with ______.
Bark once for ______, twice for ______.
______ is how I get consent.
It's not just about sex, it's also about ______.
Peanutbutter works fine, but I prefer ______.
Upon coming out to my mother, I was shocked she knew about ___.
r/
___
For a zoo, safe sex means ______.


If you like these and want me to try to come up with some others, I can.

soldierboy2b Doggo 5 points on 2017-09-07 16:13:02

These are much better than mine, more please.

Swibblestein 9 points on 2017-09-07 19:25:25

White Cards:

Leda and the Swan
Waking up snuggled between three dogs
Hairballs from oral sex
Hani Miletski
Yet another terrible zoo documentary
Flagging
Giggling at "doggystyle"
Being deepthroated by giraffe tongue
Denying interest in zoophilia while drawing feral pornography
Therians
Falling in love with the neighbor's dog
Hybrid abominations
Popping a boner when passing a farm
Wondering if animal semen invalidates an otherwise vegan diet
Beastforum
Covertly adding a Z at the end of LGBT
Carefully trimmed fingernails


Black Cards:

"There's some stretching required, but you can practice with ______."
______ is why I became a veterinarian
"How was petsitting? Anything interesting happen?"
______ - There's still hope!
Why was I banned from the petting zoo?
What's the one thing that zoophilia and voodoo magic have in common?
Pet free apartments can be improved with ______.
______ resulted in a very awkward conversation with my doctor.
I woke up with a hangover at the zoo, with only ______ to indicate what happened.

soldierboy2b Doggo 3 points on 2017-09-07 22:36:04

The "vegan diet" one is perfect because I'm vegan, and in more of a joking manner, have asked myself that question before. Can't stop laughing!

Battlecrops cat kisser extraordinaire 1 point on 2017-09-09 22:47:18

These are hilarious, good job

Swibblestein 1 point on 2017-09-09 23:12:32

I appreciate that. They were fun to come up with.

Susitar Canidae 4 points on 2017-09-07 11:54:04

White Cards:

Genital contact with feral cats

A fake wolfdog

Humping for dominance

Attraction to humans

Breaking into a zoo

Animal rights activism

Horse cum

Pretending to be asexual

Youtube video of lions mating

A very special type of catnip

Eating meat of your preferred species

Listening to dogs panting

Black cards:

Rabies infections spread through _____ and _____

What is the best idea for a romantic date with your pet?

Last night, I had an erotic dream about _______

In the future, I hope to get ______

Zoophilia is nothing like ________

Is _____ still legal?

Your neighbour might seem normal, but he's into ______

Bitches love it when you give them ______

The true way to seduce a German shepherd is _______

Swibblestein 1 point on 2017-09-07 14:32:05

I like a lot of your white cards, but not as much your black cards.

G_Shepherd fluffy wuffy 6 points on 2017-09-07 22:27:31

White Cards.


The neighbors pet chihuahua

A tight dog

Hiding the evidence

A vaginal massage

Uploading your latest love video

Getting the horse all worked up

Taking in the petting zoo donkey

Suffocating on your labrador's knot

Feverishly denying but your body language tells a different story

Getting caught in the act

Sleeping with your dog on bed during a cold winter

Having feelings for the cat

Getting hard when you see bambi grown up

Nala's bedroom eyes

Sensual massaging your friend's pet

secretly in love with the police dog

can't stop thinking of that adorable snout

Black cards:

To make your dog really happy, you _____, but I prefer _____.

A new position to try with your dog is _____.

No docter, I didnt give Rex _____.

Why am I at the stables at these hours? oh I'm just ____.

You wanted to know why I am walking funny? ____.

If you open the secret folder on my computer, you will find ____, ____ and ____.

Condoms? You don't need them for ____.

Yes, I'm single. Is that a problem? it's not like I'm ___.

I secretly want to ____.

Nah ____ isn't fun, but ___ surely is.

No, dishonesty isn't why I'm going to hell, I'm going there because of _____.

soldierboy2b Doggo 1 point on 2017-09-08 02:07:46

Wait, let's say hypothetically I some how could make this a third party expansion. Would that be cool?

Kynophile Dog lover 2 points on 2017-09-08 03:44:29

I'd buy it for the right price.

soldierboy2b Doggo 1 point on 2017-09-08 03:56:46

The problem would how many packs I could make, I only have so much money for printing, LOL.

Kynophile Dog lover 1 point on 2017-09-08 11:30:12

How to get custom sets printed, if you wanted individuals to pay for the printing and shipping themselves:

  1. Put the cards in a generator to make files for a printer.
  2. Release said files here or wherever convenient. Feel free to put up a small paywall (maybe five dollars at most) to compensate for the time needed to make the files, or make them freely available to anyone who wants them. They'll also need files for the card backs, available on the previous link.
  3. Have everyone get their cards printed. Recommended settings are 63X88 mm, 310 gsm linen. Since cards are printed on sheets that can fit multiples of 18 and priced accordingly, the most efficient numbers of white and black cards will be multiples of 18, but that's not too important.
soldierboy2b Doggo 1 point on 2017-09-09 01:47:27

Okay, so assuming that's everyone. There are about 178 white cards and 55 black cards now.