[NS] [Just a bit of fun] The future of zoo stereotypes (self.zoophilia)
submitted 2017-09-17 01:36:12 by Swibblestein
So, was thinking about the change in gay stereotypes today - how it went from "gays are predatory pedophiles and drug-crazed sexual opportunists" to things like "gays are flamboyant, well-dressed, well-muscled hairdressers / interior designers."
Basically, a shift from negative stereotypes to neutral / positive stereotypes.
So I thought it might be a fun time to take some wild guesses at what zoo stereotypes might emerge in the future, if our own negative stereotypes were to disappear. What sorts of things might end up associated with zoos in the future, in such a circumstance?
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Zoos make good stud farm managers.
As far as occupations go, I always sorta associated zoophiles with computer programmers more than any other career.
That would probably disappear if negative stereotypes were to vanish, but I unconsciously link zoos with paranoia. Partially because it forced me to study cryptography which I happened to really enjoy. Knowing how to encrypt your data and not leaving any traces is pretty useful skill.
me irl
From my brief associations with some older zoos though, the "stud farm manager" occupational stereotype might not be too far off.
That's all I'm saying.
Here are some I'd think would come about through misunderstandings about the positive characteristics of zoos:
"Oh my god, he gets my dog so well! It's like he's a dog psychic!"
"Jim's a zoo, so you'll never have to worry about sexual harassment with him. He'd be a good fit for our battered women's shelter."
"He's into mares? Really? You HAVE to get him to eat you out: I'm sure he knows some really good techniques by now."
"You should tell Brad about that: he's zoo, so he's not gonna judge you for it."
"Hey, Stacy, you're zoo, right? What's a good VPN service for a company our size?"
I love these.
I'd imagine a future stereotype is that we would be the outdoorsy type.
"Cecilia sure loves to spend a lot of time out in the country side, climbing trees and... wait, you don't think she's a zoo, do you?"
"Nah, you know, I'm pretty sure you can like that stuff without being into animals in that way, don't be so prejudiced. I mean, my hairdresser is a man who likes pink, but he is married to a woman, so..."
I got an image in my head of a pair of gossiping old grannies just now, chatting like this over a game of cards, and it was adorable.
Boss: Guys we need to figure out how to solve this algorithm for calculating the hashing possibilities for our search engine, who can do it?
Teammate: Jonh you are a zoo, right... you must know about these things.
Jonh: What? wait?...
Johana: Mary, why are you staring at the stallions like that?
Mary: Nothing, they look nice; look at those manes.
Johana: omg you are a zoo...
Mary: noo... damn!...
Amy: Ron, ron, my cat is acting retarded...
Ron: Uh?...
Amy: Fix it please... look...
Ron: Wait, what does it make you think I can fix... oh what the hell is he doing?...
Amy: I don't know he is chasing his paw or something.
Ron (Checks paw, finds a piece of sticking glue in the paw, removes it).
Amy: Omg you fixed it.
Ron: Well it was pretty clear, I mean...
Amy: thanks....!!!
Ron: Okay ._.
Optimistically, the stereotypical profile would probably be a left-leaning libertarian who's environmentally conscious and good with animals, although socially awkward and introverted. People who have sex with larger animals would be considered to be risk takers/good in bed, although women would be judged more negatively for that while men with smaller animals would be judged as being poor performers/having small penises (or more positively, more sensitive).
Old stereotypes: Farmers.
New stereotypes: Furries.
Zoos have funky punk hair and are fun to drink cocktails with, or alternatively, suck cock's tails with.