I hate myself because of this. (self.zoophilia)
submitted 2015-07-07 23:48:48 by helpbeast Craving dogs
I don't know if I'm supposed to post here or not... please tell me if I should put this somewhere else... I'll just be blunt... I hate it that I have zoophilia... it's hard even admitting it to myself. Painful, even. I get this extreme feeling of guilt every time I'm reminded that I have this fetish/kink, or if I find myself aroused by animals. I already have a boyfriend, and while I am sexually attracted to him, sometimes it's not enough to turn me on... I'm wondering what I should do... Do any of you have experience with this type of guilt? I'd really like to talk to any of you who sympathize with this or have advice for me. I'd be happy to answer any of your questions that you have. Thanks for reading <3
I think lots of people who have come to terms with being a zoophile have felt guilty about their attraction to animals. It's not uncommon to feel distressed about having these attractions, or wanting them to go away.
In my opinion, you should figure out what exactly it is that interests you sexually in animals-- uncovering that might help you feel better about yourself or adjust your behavior to be more in line with what you expect.
For example: Are you attracted to animals themselves? Their physical forms, their personalities, and so on? Do you want to be in a relationship with the animal, or are you exclusively interested in the act of a human and animal having sex? If so, is it the taboo that excites you, or something about the act itself?
Thanks, I'm actually trying right now... it's only recently that I've actually accepted myself as a zoophile, so I haven't much thought on what exactly interests me... I've only tried to repress it... Thanks for the help :)
Good questions, IAmAZoophile.
You are not alone. Many people go through a period where they question their own zoophilia.
Thank you... I just hope I come to good terms with it someday...
I think every zoophile has had feelings like this to varying degrees in their lifetime. It's most certainly difficult knowing you are attracted to something society at large says you should not be. What is important to know and accept first and foremost, is that zoophilia is not a disease, and it doesn't dictate the kind of person you choose to be. You are not a bad person for being sexually attracted to animals, and your attraction to animals does not mean there is something wrong with you. Societal judgement deems our relationships abusive, but zoophilic relationships can be just as loving and caring as others , and learning the difference can make it much easier to accept an attraction to animals. There are plenty of good folks and friends here who will help to guide you along the way.
I've honestly gone my whole life thinking something was terribly wrong with me... your words mean a lot. <3 I think I might be visiting this place a bit more often, then.
You've gone your whole life? How young were you when you noticed your feelings about animals? It is a personal question you don't have to talk about it if you're not comfortable.
That's okay:) Maybe like... 7-8? Maybe younger. I didn't recognize it as being attracted to animals at the time. I was too young to understand I think. Now I look back and realize, "Wow, this has been going on for a while..."
lol you sound like me. back when I was a kiddo snuggling with the dogs (completely innocently back then ) and the parents thinking it was cute. Looking back now...heh, yeah ive always been a zoo.
Hahaha I remember doing that, too
This assumption always interests me. On one hand, you could say that snuggling was an indicator of ones future emotional and sexual development. On the other hand, it could be argued that the behavior itself is responsible for zoophilic tendencies.
It would be an interesting study to measure the percentage of self identifying zoophilies who had early childhood experiences that emotionally bonded them to an animal vs. those that didn't.
Edit: I most certainly had this experience as well. I would often sleep in our family GSDs crate with her. Turns out, I am emotionally and sexually attracted to dogs with those features. I just wonder if I hadn't had that experience, would I still identify as zoo.
I'd love to know one way or another. Im still pretty convinced that you are born the way you are. for some reason our brain is wired the way it is and that draws you to certain things relating to it. in our case, dogs. I'm pretty sure there are a few zoos around who never grew up with pets either. If zoophilia was learned I dont get how they'd acquire it.
On the other hand, like you say animals emotionally bond (imprint) themselves to other animals fairly regularly. Its not too far of a stretch to think that we imprinted ourselves onto our dogs while growing up.
hmm, actually stopping and thinking about that for a bit, its not too far of a stretch...now I'm intrigued.
I didn't grow up with pets until my mid teen years yet I still identify as being a zoo. I guess this supports you theory of being born either a zoo or a non zoo.
that is indeed a good question. i don't believe people are born gay or born zoo .. that there is a "gay gene" or anything like that. i DO think it's possible there might be some genetic code that determines how "normal" you are, though, and if you tend to be towards the more sexually unusual end of the spectrum, it's then certain triggers that can lead one to become zoo or gay or bi, etc. but i dunno .. maybe that's basically the same thing and i only think it's different. shrug
my point is simply that i think it's possible that those experiences put us on the path to being a zoophile vs. the other way around. then again, there are people who are zoophiles who had little to no contact with the animal they're most attracted to. shrug
I see what you´re trying to put across, but have to contradict. I personally think it is neither genetic nor learned. I believe it´s imprinting, a process of sudden connection of brain circuits, at least in those "born zoos". But we have to take into account there actually IS some kind of a "learned sexuality" if you manage to re-imprint your sexual brain circuits; this is possible, for example, by watching porn excessively, hammering the "new" triggers into your neurons until they´re the only ones that "do the trick". There´s also the factor of addiction, examples of "porn/sex carreers" exist. The patterns of usage of porn/sex and hard drugs are comparable in some cases; dosage increase,frequency increase and potency increase.In our case, more porn/sex and harder porn/sex, leading from vanilla to the most extreme, zoophilia being a integral part of the latter as one of the three major taboos left today (zoo, necro,pedo).
There isn´t an easy answer to the big question any zoo has asked himself at least once in his life: Why? Goddamn,why?? For each and every one, different explanations apply.
Sometimes I wonder if the hindus are right and reincarnation is real; our orientation would become easily explainable as a remnant of a former life as an animal and there are lots of zoos who actually believe in concepts similar to the hinduistic reincarnation idea. I do, too...but I guess the hindus got it wrong, upside down. The hindus believe birthmarks and personality (including sexuality) are determined by good or bad karma coming from the lives you already have lived. I, on the contrary, believe that what I experience now, feeling like a horse hides inside me, is a tiny glimpse into my future life. The hindus believe being an animal is actually a punishment for negative conduct in former lives and, according to that ,being a human is a gift for good conduct and a stepping stone to become a deva, a god. I strongly disagree, being a human may be the most miserable form of existence and I think I did something very bad in an earlier life to be forced into this furless monkeysuit.;)
Back to serious: for ages, philosophers, scientists, religions, spiritualists etc argue about the big "why?". No one brought us nearer to absolute certainty why everything is as it is. There are several different approaches, but not one of them will provide us with the magical "100% certainty". Asking "Why is someone a zoophile?" is equally doomed to fail because there isn´t a single, isolated cause for the "animal fucker plague",IMHO. But there´s one thing I´d like to state: before puberty, there´s no zoophilia. Some folks described their strong bonds to animals when they were very young. Well, almost any kid loves animals and has a deep connection to his pet. If it was solely dependent on having such a connection to your pet, we zoophiles would outnumber any other sexual prevalence group by far. I don´t think that pre-pubescent affliction for animals is an important factor of becoming someone with a sexual-emotional interest for animals; of course, it plays a certain role, but isn´t "the root of all evil". Puberty and the experiences you make when your sexuality awakens will form your orientation. As I said above, the imprinting mechanism then comes into play ( Anyone can remember his first time, almost no one remembers his third or fourth time, right? Imprinting works exactly like this). It is puberty shaping what gets you into the right mood for "sexytime" ;) Connecting emotional and sexual love for animals turns you into a zoo; both ingredients are needed. If you only have emotional love, you´re no different from the average, animal loving normal person. If it´s only sexual love , then you´re a bestialist/beasty. Only if both parts are involved, connotated positively and in equilibrium, being a genuine zoo is possible.Negative connotations can lead to difficulties. There are some people out there who would like to have sex with an animal, but are afraid of their favourite species (Negative connotation in emotional love), others love animals emotionally, but are repulsed by the actual sex act and would never do it themelves, while watching others do it is totally appropriate for them (Negative connotation in sexual love).
So there´s no "I am a zoo since childhood". Zoophilia is a sexual orientation, pre-pubescent humans have no developed sexuality before puberty. The sex part determines it, if you act it out or prefer to be a "romantic" zoophile without any actual sex, but fantasies about having sex with animals. Having a good friend of the same gender when you´re a kid won´t turn you into a homosexual either, am I right? ;)
So, please no more "I´m a zoo since I was XX (insert random number below 12), folks. Thank you. ;)
nope, im opening this back up for discussion :\^)
Imprinting in animals happens basically from when they're born. Imprinting is there to give infants the best chance of survival by tagging onto an animal that already knows the ropes. Even if its a different species they have a better chance of survival than going it alone. Of course you're not going to be thinking of bonking the family pet as a kiddo but that doesnt mean that your bonding is on par with everyone else who has a pet. If so many kids grow up loving their dogs why are there so few zoos? My theory, the zoo gene makes makes us love our pets on a level above everyone else. By the time you reach sexual maturity the imprinting stage is long gone. When the world was dog eat dog what use is there for a species to be friendly with everything that comes its way?
Imprinting isnt a sexual behavior though. its mostly a survival trait. by the time of sexual maturity you better be pretty bloody good at surviving already or youre in trouble.
I do agree somewhat that watching porn solidifies it, but again, what pushed you to find it erotic in the first place? I can tell you right away, in my case it wasn't because I got bored of everything else. Honestly I find your whole first paragraph pretty insulting. you seem to imply I was just porn obsessed and that led me here. are you having a laugh? The learned sexuality you talk about are what leads to the beasties and we all know their sexuality isnt zoophile, its a fetish at that point. The zoophile sexuality you have at puberty leads to porn. the porn without the romantic feelings leads to bestiality.
Also Im willing to bet a lot of money that whatever causes people to be gay or even pedophiles, are the same mechanisms that cause us to be zoos.
Okay,I´m gonna try and sort it out one by one: "Imprinting in animals(...)already knows the ropes." No. Too simple. A brains consists of several brain circuits, not one. A baby (human or animal) will go through several stages of development until it reaches maturity. According to Leary´s and Wilson´s model of the brain, there are four basic circuits: 1.The oral Bio Survival system This seems to contain imprints and conditioning dating from early infancy, with subsequent learning nuilt upon that foundation. If you stop and think about, you know how a carpet tastes, how the leg of a chair tastes, etc. You may even remember how that dirt in a flower pot tastes. This knowledge dates from the oral stage of infancy in which we take nourishment (bio survival) through the mother´s nipples and also judge other objects by putting them in our mouths. A large part of parenting an infant consists in following the "little darling" around and shouting "Don´t put that in your mouth" whenever they try to taste/test something toxic. Imprinting this circuit determines whether you develop a neophobic (fear of new), "conservative" or a neophilic, explorative personality. Imprinting is done in the baby stage.
2.The Anal Territorial system Since all mammals mark their territories with excretions, the "toddler" stage of development and associated toilet training produces a system of synergetic imprints and conditioning concerned with territory and what Freudians call "anality" (sadomasochism).Those who take a dominant imprint in this system seek power all their lives; those with a submissive imprint seek dominant types to lead them (the Reichian Führerprinzip) and most people settle somewhere between these extremes, taking a masochist stance toward those "above" them (government,landlords,etc.) toward selected victims defined as "below" them (wives,children,"inferior races", people on welfare,etc.) This Territorial circuit is imprinted at the toddler stage by fighting and determines your stance in conflict situations ("fight or flight").Example: Youg colts start to fight each other in a playful manner to determine their future rank in the herd.
3.The Semantic Time-Binding system After the growing child acquires language - i.e., learns that the flux of experience has had labels and indexes assigned to it by the tribal game-rules - a new information system becomes imprinted and conditioned, and this system can continue growing and learning for a lifetime. In animals, this laryngo (larynx - greek for throat) based system is rudimentary, but it still determines another partial self of the individual ( from shy,silent to self confident, outspoken). The social self is imprinted at a stage of development when communication with others is established. Usually, humans reach this stage at the age of 4-6 years, when the first friendships develop.
cont.
Now, we´re getting to the important stuff:
I, for example, am the total antithesis of "zoo leads to porn". I´m 43 now, and until today,I´ve only watched around 20 flics of AP, most of them when downloading 1 MB with a 33.3 K modem took an hour. Actually, being a zoo led me away from porn. As a kid, I never had any "special connection" to animals; we had a family dog, a bobtail my father got from the UK when I was around 8 or 9. I loved him, but I wouldn´t say I had a deeper connection than other kids. I had no access to horses and my only experience with a horse took place when I was 5 years old in my kindergarden. It was the last day of kindergarden for my group and we had a little festivity to celebrate our transition to school. There was an opportunity for riding a pony, so my mother put me into the saddle and the owner of the pony led me around until the pony (it was a mare) threw me off and, as a little "present", bit me. I cried a lot, according to my mother´s stories, and refused to get back in the saddle. Today, I´m all about horses, I work as a riding instructor specialized on dressage, live in a longtime relation with my mare, am an "exclusive" horse zoo and simply can´t imagine living without horses for the rest of my life. How does that fit into what has been stated here ("zoo since I was 6")?
Back to the imprint issue: As I have shown, any mammal goes through several stages of imprints during life. The 4th circuit is imprinted at puberty, not before, although the other three circuits play a certain role in the imprinting process of the 4th.
I really wonder why you consider my first paragraph an insult. What I wrote was a general statement about different mechanisms leading to imprinting or pseudo-imprinting the 4th ciruit and wasn´t targeted at you specifically. I never aimed at insulting anyone, your reaction really surprises me; could it be that I unintentionally hit a nerve in you? Believe me, I laugh often and like to laugh, but when I discuss zoophilia and anything related to it, usually I´m dead serious. Your statement "zoo leads to porn" definitely is false; most zoophiles despise porn as exploitation of the animals,´cause it basically is simple objectifying the animal for financial gain or similar benefits. (BF: Upload your porn for "download credits" and comments virtually patting your shoulder) ZETA states that animal porn mostly finds it´s consumers in the group of non-zoo, normal persons looking for taboo, "special", perverted stuff and I agree with them on that.
Finally, your last sentence: Yes, and it is called sexual imprinting at the beginning of puberty, forming a new, sexual personality not preexistent before said beginning of puberty, depending on the imprints of the other circuits and many random factors.
Playing Devils Advocate, Is it scientifically proven that your so called imprinting systems (Anal Territorial and Semantic Time-Binding) really exist as you describe.
Yes, same here! I've actually tried looking up what causes it... but I haven't found anything of merit.
Well, don't worry about it too much. I hope you'll eventually feel comfortable with yourself and your sexual preferences. :)
More than anything, I feel that who I am is not wrong and that there isnt anything to be ashamed of. Once you realize that the guilt you're feeling is from learned social and moral norms, self acceptance gets a lot easier.
Okay, thanks :) I'll try to be a bit more accepting of myself...
We are perfectly normal. Some people condemn us and try to force us to renounce our love of animals but humans are animals too. I repressed my feelings for many years but have embraced my true nature now. I refuse to allow society to force their version of morality on me.
I hope I achieve that one day :) I really have nothing against other Zoos.. so I know it's just a problem with me and how I feel people would see me.
I think that other people really do not understand this thing. They really don't get it at all. It's like I have no idea. They are completely clueless about it as far as I feel. They're freaks.
I've talked to my close friends and boyfriend about how they feel about it (just weaving it into conversation, not openly admitting I'm into it) and they all feel that it's pretty gross, and sometimes animal abuse. I understand because sometimes it can be animal abuse... but most of the time not...
Keep in mind that what people see of it "on the news" no matter how innocent is always couched as disturbing, gross and abuse. It is unlikely a lot of people give it more thought than that. They will repeat what they have heard, even the news people are just doing that and perpetuating the stereotype.
Some recent experiences with a friend of mine and some really bad shit (not animal related) that happened to him has reinforced my dislike of news "journalism" as a source of information. Seriously, knowing some of the facts of his case the papers never once got close to the truth unless they were verbatim stating facts as released by the police and even then they put a spin on it.
I wish I knew how to get around this problem. I've been aware of the inaccuracy journalism for a while, but I still somehow treat it as authoritative if I'm not making a conscious effort to remember the truth. It's probably just as hard for those in the industry.
You feel badly that you feel attracted (in that way) to non-human animals? Even though animals are adult sexual beings? Why should you feel badly about that? This is probably even flattery for the animals if they could know what you think about them :)
That makes me feel a bit better, thanks :) When you look at it that way it doesn't seem so bad... I still have a few things to work out though :/
Hey, I'm still trying to "find myself" after having this romantic attraction/inclination to animals for my whole life. I always come back to it. It calls me. It's spiritual, I do very much believe. It is also something I feel a little conflicted with. I need to explore this path.
Well, I'm glad I'm not alone in this. :)
When I first came to a realization of my attraction, I was horrified and disgusted with myself. Because what I knew of this new "thing" I learned about me, what I knew was only fallacies that had been fed to me by society. I thought I was going to end up a dog-raping introvert and "grinch" to society. And I didn't want to be that. I didn't want to hurt anyone, I love animals. Looking back, I feel it was somewhat silly to feel that way but at the same time what I was thinking was not irrational because it was all I knew. I only knew what society had fed me. I came to a point of realization, however, that I am consciously aware of these things I feel and I am aware of how I want to be. I didn't have to be a weird dog-raping introvert if I didn't have to. I am in control and I am the one who has made my decisions to this day. Now, my way of thinking didn't turn to that over night. It took a lot of exploration, both of myself and of the things I was feeling. The biggest step for me, I think, was talking to other people. Entering the community was a really big step for me. I was able to meet people who absolutely understood what I was going through and who were able to act as an outlet of understanding for my emotions regarding this.
And that being said, if you decide you need someone to talk to, do not hesitate to shoot me a PM. I'd love to chat if you want to.
Oh my gosh, me too... As soon as I was kinda realizing I felt "dirty" and bad... I still kinda do, really. I'm glad it's such a supportive community here. Thanks for your help and advice :)
I'm glad you feel we have a strong support group. I think that is really important for us, especially at this "stage," if you will. Our voice is at this time very quiet and we are put down very severely by society, and I know firsthand how tough and dark it can sometimes be, how it can convince one to feel so negatively about themselves.
And another tidbit of advice I suppose: Even though you still at this point feel disgust and guilt over this, I urge you to try and find the strength to explore this more. I'm not telling you to go out and have sex with an animal or anything, but find ways to incorporate them more in your life, like by doing volunteer work. I find that when I started out a ways back at the local shelter, I began to feel better about myself because I was seeing these animals and forming connections with them. Strong and positive connections. And these connections I made, again, led me back to learning more about myself and how much care I expressed for the animals. I also found later, when I grew comfortable with my attraction, that the relationships I had with these animals helped pass time in the interim between me actually finding a mate.
There is a local shelter that I can volunteer at.. I'll take your advice and do that :) Hopefully it'll have the same effect on me, because I really want to either repress it fully or accept it... and the latter is more likely, and probably more healthy.
I hope you find acceptance in yourself as well. I believe that repression essentially always comes out to a negative ending, at least in my first and second hand experiences. It may or may not be an easy road to follow, but it is one I believe you should stick to, and one I believe you'd be glad you did.
It isn't always a smooth road, so just remember you have a pretty large group of people right here if you ever find yourself in a low point or a rut. Everyone here is going to listen to and support you. I am only saying this because I feel like I've been there before and not until I really stuck myself into this community and really became a part of that did I realize that and utilize it.
Yeah... It's just hard not to repress it, since it's something I hate in myself (not other Zoos though). But I'm so happily surprised by the amount of support here... really, thank you guys <3
just be careful not to give in to any temptations you might feel. i did something of this sort when i was younger, and had opportunities to be alone with the animals. i was a bad person... the only thing that saved me was the fact that surveillance wasn't common back then (read: i'm old-ish).
Don't worry, I would never hurt an animal or make them do something against their will :) And dear god I'd never let anyone see...
i'm sure you wouldn't hurt them or force them. but seriously, it's not a matter of trying to be certain no one's around if you do something ... you never know who could be around. i almost got caught once because someone forgot their purse and came back for it. just don't do anything in a public place .. especially not with other people's animals. you never know .. even with an animal that's completely willing and even enthusiastic.. what if that's another zoophile's animal? how would they feel if they found out you had an encounter with their loved one?
If I did do anything sexual with an animal, it would be with my own only, and DEFINITELY not in a public place... to me it's reaallly not worth getting caught. Thanks for the advice though, I appreciate it :)
Try not to worry too much, being a zoophile doesnt make you a bad person. We're all normal people here , dont believe the description society gives us that we fuck animals with no care for them because we're shut-ins who cant get a human GF/BF.
The only thing it really changes is that you might have to accept that your life will take a different path to the one you thought you'd take. It'll all work itself out in the end, you just gotta give it some time :)
Thanks for the advice :) As for the changes... That's what I'm mostly worried about... I don't want them to be negative :/
no they wont be, but you might have some pretty heavy hitting realisations. The hardest one for me was that I probably wont ever get the wife and two kids american dream type scanario that I was told is the way youre supposed to live your life.
I'm zoo exclusive mind you, if you still like guys then you can still go down that path, but trying to force yourself to like humans if deep down you know you dont will just prolong the period before youre able to truely accept who you are. ugh, I tried it for years, didnt work.
Honestly though, im happier having come to terms with not having a wife and kids, its just one of those things that comes with being a zoo. I havent completely ruled it out either, who knows what life is going to throw at you.
Well, living with a dog only for the rest of my life doesn't seem too too bad ;) I love dogs! I think I still will be into guys, however... But it might be hard living without a dog... partner. Like you said, I guess I'll have to see :S I just hope I can come to terms with it.
Zoophilia isn't always an easy thing for people to accept in themselves, but you've taken a step in the right direction by reaching out to other zoos. You're more than welcome to post here anytime there's something you're unsure of, or anytime there's a topic you'd like to discuss.
The others here have done a wonderful job of addressing your general concerns, so I'll touch on something else in your post.
Zoo-exclusivity (only being attracted to animals) is something that a lot of us have different views on. Some of us are interested in humans and animals interchangeably, some feel the need for both a human partner and an animal partner, and others such as myself are perfectly content with only an animal relationship.
The point here is that zoophilia isn't something you have to devote yourself to; you can like animals and still like humans. You can even be interested in them for different reasons. Maybe you have a more romantic interest in humans and a more sexual interest in animals, or vice versa. As others here have suggested, I think you should take some time to figure out what it is you like. The details can change as time goes on, but the more you understand this part of yourself, the easier it will be to accept.
I'm really glad I'm not alone with this... And yeah, it's pretty hard to know why I like animals right now, or what I like about them... All I know is that I like BOTH humans and animals. Thanks for your advice on this... your confidence makes me feel better :)
i'm sure i'm not the only one here, but i haven't seen this perspective posted anywhere on this page yet, so i figured i'd speak up.
the self-loathing you feel .. i would say probably 95% of zoophiles have felt it at some point in their development. mine was much more personal than just the typical societal cues that one gets from society at large. i was so naive that .. even before i had full sexual urges, i was found out due to my own stupidity. as a young kid, i felt the need to brag to a friend who was visiting .. or possibly defend myself that i wasn't so ignorant .. i had to show him that i knew what sex was. so i took down my pants.. picked up one of our cats and put my tiny little penis near her even tinier little pussy lips, just to show that i knew that "tab A" was supposed to go with "slot B" ... not realizing that in general, society expects tab A and slot B to belong to members of the same species. boy did i get a lesson quick... he told my brother, and my brother told my parents and i got a first-hand message that i should be very very ashamed of my thoughts and that i should never ever have those thoughts again.
of course.. they didn't go away .. and once i was sexually aware, i found myself looking at pictures of animals that showed things people weren't supposed to acknowledge. a further incident later in my childhood (teen years) taught me to be utterly silent and sneaky about fulfilling my desires with the family dog. but all of this, again, was building the guilt and self-hate up inside me. thankfully i never did anything foolish to hurt myself or worse, but i do regret not fighting to keep a dog we had gotten from a shelter when we decided to move.. which my parents decided would have to go back to the shelter. had i not been so afraid and ashamed of my feelings, and had i convinced them to keep her, my life would likely have been much more fulfilling much sooner than it has finally become, some 20 years later. the fact is, that dog taught me that dogs DO enjoy sexual activity (i was able to make her orgasm even with "outercourse" .. i didn't think intercourse would be possible for us because she was spayed, and she would come back for more, so i knew she enjoyed it), and it made me wake up and see that making her happy was very fulfilling .. that it wasn't just about fulfilling my own desires. if only i had the extra years with her to explore that more ... sigh ..
my point is simply to say that .. you aren't alone. as i said, i would guess a very high percentage of zoophiles have gone through the same self-hate that you're experiencing now, but yes, "it gets better".
Thank you for sharing your experience. I'm not glad that you felt this way, but it makes me feel better that I'm not the only one going through this...
i'm glad to hear that; that was my intent.
Wow that is a very interesting story. So when you did that thing with the cat, how come the zoophilia thing didn't stop for you then? Even after being shamed by your parents.. I would think someone with that experience may run away from it as fast as they could (you probably would have been very young so your sexual orientation should not have developed yet- I would think your experience would be a great deterrent or perhaps you just always thought of animals in this way?)
For me, I always held the conviction that it was actually morally correct to romance with a different species- even to that level of romance. I don't think I really got a lot of negative attention for it as a child. I never did anything sexual with animals when I was young- but due to my love of Yogi Bear, I received some attention. I remember my grandma laughing when I was very young, she said, "her kids are gonna have black noses!" I was happily thinking to myself, "Yeah! That sounds great!! I should do that!!" (Of course, at the time I didn't know how babies were made- just that romantic marriage couples would get them).
i disagree. as others have said here and elsewhere, it would seem that people can become zoophiles before they're even sexually aware, or perhaps it's better to say that there are/were signs they would become zoophiles before they were sexually aware.
funny comment about the black-nosed kids. when i started sharing my interest in furries (i didn't know that's what they were called back then, and it wasn't sexual yet) with my mom, and my intent to become a geneticist, she made some comment about me having a wife that was furry. the typical parental/familial support for something they think (hope) is just a phase.
if your grandma is still around, have you mentioned to her that those feelings haven't gone away? does she still think it's cute? sorry. i don't mean to be a downer about it, but what can i say? i'm cynical.
To comment on the sex. orientation- I agree with you- It's kinda like how people are born gay or straight (or bi, etc..). I think Zoophilia is the same way.
Look, I think it's too late to comment, but...
I guess I'm the 5% of zoos who accepted themselves relatively unscathed in the process of acceptance, moreover you can dismiss my perspective if you wish because I am only 17 and therefore I am "too immature" - not a direct quote but implied well enough - to decide what my sexuality is. However, I understand what it must feel like to be in your situation where it seems like this is the only place you can express your own feelings about your own sexuality, which it most likely is. But you can't let it get you down: worrying that people will find out will only make this disgust you feel for yourself even stronger - it will fester up and send you into a perpetual loop of self-loathing. You can't let that happen.
u/IAmAZoophile makes a good point in that you should understand what it is about the animal that you are attracted to. For me, I know appearance takes my interest, the females I pay special attention to, but the personality is the decider in who I like.
But let me ask you a question, if you will. What species are you interested in?
hm..... please don't take one or a few people's feelings as the opinion of this subreddit as a whole.
i'm very sorry you were met with such ridiculous nitpicking and skepticism.
the trouble is, theres so many people whos opions are "I like animals degrading women, im a zoophile!" or "who gives a shit about the animals I just want to fuck something, Im a zoophile!". Its hard to not be sceptical of someone who introduces themselves as a zoo because you never really know their true thoughts on the matter until you grill them a bit.
yeah we were probably a little hard on baaxten, but thats the nature of the beast (pun not intended :P ) at the moment.
no, it's not. i don't recall anyone else recently being grilled as badly as he was.
you dont think so? hmm what would you think if a BF member came in here calling himself a zoo and asking for hookups?
true no one else was grilled as bad but if I remember right some his answers seemed to imply he mightn't have been a zoo.
Please, the topic is about u/helpbeast, let's redirect our attention to him/her and not to the past.
But for your information, it appears to me that all that had happened was that I was continually asked questions until I slipped up in a way that others could exploit and call my bluff on.
I see no questioning of Helpbeast's attraction. He/she too is a new member. Where is the ridicule?
Regardless, let us end this discussion here. We may continue this some other time in a thread regarding a more related issue.
he DIDN'T ask for a hookup, and using BF as an example is rather extreme. and the whole "true zoo" argument is just another way to make an us vs. them. "guilty until proven innocent" could turn away good people who need help from those of us who've been through more of this than they have. i'm not saying questions shouldn't be asked, but i don't like seeing new people treated poorly.
yeah. I dunno, just caught everyone on a bad day I guess.
Oh, come on, Baaxten, now you´re acting according to your age. Complaining about being asked questions while others (with a whole different type of first appearance ) are not is infantile IMHO. Man up, dude and try to understand why the bombardment of questions is a necessity for a group that can easily be infiltrated by people with bad intent when too naive and willing to believe too quickly. Instead, you should see it as an honor to be "grilled". And for the age thing: I beg your pardon, but at the age of seventeen you simply cannot know what will be in 20,30 years, unless you´re a Nostradamus type of clairvoyant, which ,I presume, is not the case. I´ve met many people at your age, claiming to be a 100% zoo for the rest of your life, yet a few years after, they had wife and kids, leading a "normal" life, with their interest in zoophilia disappeared completely.I do not say this is the case with you, but the possibility of living through a phase with only a temporary sexual interest in animals exists.
Heck, when I was 17, I already had many shortlived affairs with mares, no experience and interest in humans, called myself a zoo the same way as you do, with conviction, but I never would have been so audacious to exclude any future changes in my orientation. I was aware that you never know what the future will bring. The first time I really was convinced I would stay a zoo for the rest of my life was when I was around maybe 30 or so. It´s like talking to a teenager about his future job: the youngster will tell you he´d be a neurosurgeon, a geneticist, an astronaut, etc....with a glance in his eyes. A few years later, they find themselves stuck in a boring 9-5 office job.
I apologize for my doubts, but you have to admit you can´t foresee what will be in ,let´s say, ten years.Agree? ;) Don´t hold it against me; I once was 17,too and had a similar perspective as you, although not with that irresistable idealistic youngster conviction of yours, but you haven´t been 43, seeing it from my perspective, with my life experience. I hope this now settles it once and for all. If you ever think about coming over to Germany, PM me and don´t forget to bring a few of those famous Aussie beers with you, I´d be glad to empty a few cans and bottles with you. ;)
So can I now not even offer advice to others?
I'd ignore anyone who would judge you on your age and assume things about you due to your age. While 30-30 isn't wrong in that at 17 the world DOES change it doesn't make what a 17 year old is going through any less important or what a 43 year old knows any more valuable despite what the 43 year old might think.
I personally think that some 43 year olds like myself can fall into the trap of "I was an idiot then, but I learned" and assume that everyone else will 1. be an idiot, and 2. learn the same lessons. I remember being 16 and being dismissed by the old lot of zoos, and now it's decades later and these same zoos are saying the same things and fading into obscurity. It's the "get off my lawn" syndrome that seems to be so common. I laugh at the normals at work, all fixed in their ways, threatened by change and new ideas while I'm sitting here the go to guy to fix all the problems because I just embrace the change and make work what I want it to be. If you are in the driver seat, you get to choose the destination.
On another note, my sexuality did change and anyone's can with enough trauma before the mid-twenties according to my psychologist. However it was from very bi to mostly straight...
But as you correctly and intelligently said, let's talk about and with /u/helpbeast.
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Have I said that you can´t?
why are you replying to me about this and not baaxten?
Thanks :) I feel so lucky to have found you guys... like seriously. And for me, mostly dogs, because they're the most likely to love me back lol and they're just... so cute and SO diverse!
Fair enough. And as a side note I'll say they're the easiest species to hide your attraction for, because everyone knows how enthusiastic some people can be around dogs. So if you don't go too overboard, no one would really suspect anything.
Just as a warning, you don't have to read anything else I write below.
I like dogs too, but wolf-like breeds are the most visually appealing to me (I guess this can include wolves themselves but due to their undomesticated nature I think it's fair to say I'll never come close to one, much less in Australia). In terms of looks I also like horses, dolphins, birds, and smaller theropod dinosaurs. And if you'll allow, I will explain what I like about each species.
I like dogs because of their natural affection to basically anyone who would show them love in return, and because of their general cuteness as you say. I like the wolf-like ones most because Canis lupus, or the Grey Wolf, is the origin of all domesticated dog species, and therefore a dog's natural state before humans started selectively breeding them.
I'm attracted to horses mainly because of the appearance, and because the idea of - if you'll excuse the language - giving pleasure to such a large creature that could easily harm me with a quick and effortless kick. But I've heard of the bonds many zoos ave had with their equine partners, and should I ever get the chance to meet one properly in person I too would like to try and figure out their personality.
Birds I like purely for their personality. I feed a mob of magpies at my school so they don't swoop students during Spring, and it's worked, and in the process I have seen how unique each one is from the other. And what's amazing is that they all have different faces, like humans, and pretty much any animal come to think of it...
Dolphins I find to be the sexiest creatures alive. Not only are they, in my opinion, entrancing to watch with their streamline bodies - so they immediately grab my attention - they have tightly wound social ties with one another, are very smart (not to degrade other species), have widely different personalities, and have sex for fun. They also have the potential to seriously harm you, even drown or simply beat you to death, so nothing intimate can really be done without their consent. So to gain a dolphin's consent would mean they trust you utterly, and I can only fantasise about how wonderful that kind of bond must feel.
As for my liking of dinosaurs, it's no more than a fantasy - we can only imagine what their behaviour was like and therefore I can only be sexually attracted to them, not romantically. As for how I came around to liking them, it's mainly to do with the crush I've had on the main character of the story I've finished writing. It was her beauty in both appearance and personality, and I suppose the liking of her appearance translated to all smaller theropods afterwards.
But I must rehash what i said before: my falling in love with any animal, human or otherwise (should I find humans interesting in the future, which I do not think will happen), depends solely on that animal's personality. I could love a creature for its appearance, but unless its personality is compatible with mine, I would not find myself romantically attracted to it, and that is a no-no for me. There can be no lovemaking without actual love already existing between the two parties, if you'll once again permit the language.
So that's me, and I hope I've explained myself well enough to comply with u/IAmAZoophile's recommendation. So I guess, if you're willing, it's your turn. You say you like dogs mostly and gave a reason. But what other animals and why?
I'm not sure if I'm helping. I'm not terribly great for advice.
Hmm... I'm not into that many animals- mostly just dogs. Though cats also interest me- They're charming, beautiful creatures- not to mention intelligent! And if I can find a really cuddly one-- even better.
There was a period in my life where I felt so ashamed of being attracted to dogs, that I actively tried to stop thinking about it. But you know what happens when you think "don't think about it"? You think about it.
And in my mind, I started to blame the pretty dogs I saw, for being too beautiful, and what if people noticed that I couldn't help to stare?
After just accepting that I'm a zoophile, that it doesn't really have to mean anything, and also reminding myself that people can't see that I'm one, I stopped being so obsessed with not being attracted to dogs. And so it kind of slid into the back of my mind. I can look at a dog and think "wow, so handsome!", without doing more, without blushing or getting awkward. Because the attraction itself is something people won't notice. It's normal to want to pet cute animals or look at them, so it's easy for hide this preference... Nobody has any business knowing your sexual fantasies anyway, unless you tell them.
Wow... That makes so much sense... Thanks :) I'm really trying to not not think about it.
You should feel bad. What a disgusting fetish. I found this sub by accident and I'm absolutely revolted that you guys think this is okay. ANIMALS CAN'T CONSENT.
I know you don't want to read more, but you'd realize the fallacy of that argument if you did. Not saying anymore because you've likely already made up your mind.
Ok... I know I kinda felt this way before I actually read up on what Zoophilia was and accepted the fact that I was a Zoo- So I understand your perspective- I really do! But... animals actually can consent. The best example that I can think of for you to understand is when a dog mounts a human girl. He is deciding to do this by himself, nobody is forcing him. Animals have sex drives, too- Like all mammals. And another thing: Zoophilia isn't just sex, it's about really loving the animal as an equal, and as a partner in general. And animals can DEFINITELY consent to love.
And now you've helped defend the very thing you said you hated yourself for having.
That's not a negative, I'm just saying you've now genuinely shown support for something you were skeptical about - taken a positive stance over something you were seeing in a negative light.
I'm not sure what point I'm trying to make... Sorry.
Well, yeah. I hate only MYSELF for it because I'm still confused and frustrated with my OWN sexuality-- I see only Zoophilia in MYSELF in a negative light because I feel I'm not supposed to be this way. I have never said that I see Zoophilia generally in a negative light. Others here have said the same thing: I just want to live a normal life, only wanting Human partners. Maybe I wasn't really clear on why I hated myself for this. I know I've got to accept myself, but I also reeeaaally don't want to be this way... I've got nothing against other Zoos.
I have not read through all the comments but I skimmed a little. It looks like everything has pretty much been said but I also want to iterate that there are those that accept your sexuality as perfectly fine who do not have it (I am one of them) and see no reason to be ashamed of it. As long as the animal is unharmed (physically and emotionally) I see nothing wrong with it. My PM box is always open to for both you and anybody else if you ever need somebody to vent/chat/rant to.
Thanks:) I might just need to use that offer in the future.
I'd like to talk with you cause I have the same kink do you have kik or twitter?
Sorry unfortunately I only have a personal kik :/